Some of them want to use you...
I got this in my emails today. I think it says a lot about life.
the grass is greener...
the grass is greener...
Sometimes you can reach too far!
And when you find yourself over-extended and you're stuck in a situation that you can't get out of,
there is one thing you should always remember.......
Not everyone who shows up......
Is there to help you!!!!
Someone please take away this girl's crack pipe.
OMG. Courtney Love just posted a new blog, apparently after hitting her crack pipe REAL BIG. It's titled "Curt's Dead". Yes, ya slutty ho, we know that the biggest rock icon of our time is, in fact dead.
I used to really like courtney love, I thought she was a lot of fun. But really, the girl needs to stop smoking crack then posting blogs. I don't think a lot of people realize the draw the internet has, I've made it a point now (even though a few I did were BRILLIANT) NEVER to drunk blog. If I'm not in my right head I just avoid the computer all together. There's nothing worse than realizing you posted the morning after and your blog's alread gotten a few thousand hits.
What the hell is she even talking about in her little blog here? She goes on and on about people using the last name Cobain for fraudulent purposes, but beyond that i couldn't derive any sense from it whatsoever. Can you?
Read it here. I swear myspace only featured it to make fun of her.
I used to really like courtney love, I thought she was a lot of fun. But really, the girl needs to stop smoking crack then posting blogs. I don't think a lot of people realize the draw the internet has, I've made it a point now (even though a few I did were BRILLIANT) NEVER to drunk blog. If I'm not in my right head I just avoid the computer all together. There's nothing worse than realizing you posted the morning after and your blog's alread gotten a few thousand hits.
What the hell is she even talking about in her little blog here? She goes on and on about people using the last name Cobain for fraudulent purposes, but beyond that i couldn't derive any sense from it whatsoever. Can you?
Read it here. I swear myspace only featured it to make fun of her.
Bored with Maswell dagani
Years ago I made friends with Mack Gloves, a con artist supposedly in the UK. He wanted to prepay for 10 massage visits in some ridiculous amount of like $5g's. We bantered back and forth, I played stupid if for no other reason than to amuse myself. He actually sent a money order from a bank that didn't exist. I think I ended up turning it over to the police, but now I've gotten bored again, and my new friend is Mr Maswell Dagi.
READ MORE!!!
He Started our banter with this:
DEAR FRIEND,I AM MR. MASWELL DAGANI , A BANKER IN ONE OF THE REPUTABLE BANK IN BURKINA FASO. I HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU ON A BUSINESS PROPOSAL OF US$2.5M (TEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLAR). THE DEPOSITOR OF THE SAID FUND DIED WITH HIS ENTIRE FAMILY DURING THE IRAQ WAR IN 2006. THE DECEASED CUSTOMER USED HIS WIFE AS THE NEXT OF KIN BUT UNFORTUNATELY, THE WIFE DIED ALONG SIDE WITH HIM DURING THE WAR.PLEASE i WANT YOU TO STAND AS THE NEXT OF KIN AND CLAIM THE FUND WHICH 40% OF THE MONEY WILL BE FOR YOU WHILE 60% WILL BE FOR ME WHICH I WILL COME OVER TO YOUR COUNTRY AS SOON AS THE FUND IS BEEN TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT OK. PLEASE REPLY TO THIS MY PRIVATE E-MAIL: maswell003@hotmail.fr,BEST REGARD,MR. MASWELL DAGANI ,BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER.
I was bored. Definitely. I responded first with this:
Thank you for calling me! How can I help? I like money, and you seem like a nice person so I can't see any reason not to trust you. Let me know what I need to do!
Seymour Hogginfeld
Then today, I just got this back from my new friend:
Dear Sir/Madan,
Assalamu Alaikum ..........................
+226 78 3416 67.
I am very glad for the choice i made by picking you to be my foreign partner in the execution of this transaction and truly "two good heads they say are better than one". Naturally somebody will feel some how been presented with such an offer that comes but once in ones life time, listen i got your contact throught yahoo tounish search with my laptop when i am searching for a trusted partiner who can help me and execute this transaction, really it's the work of Almight Allah who leads me to your private contact,But my dear I assure you of the 100% risk free of this.
Contact me on my private mobile phone. (+226-78 34 16 67)for the confidentiality of this transaction and don't fail to give me a call immediately you got my email for more explanation concern this transaction and also you should not disclosed to the outside world for the security of my job and the success of this deal.
I found it necessary even before your demand to give you indebt explanation on this deal and to give you details and breakdown of the modality which we have to follow to achieve this highly beneficial success. I am a banker and an insider. I know the process to be taken officially in the bank to investigate and verify your claim to grant you approval as the next of kin to the late Mr.ANDREAS SCHRANNER.
My good friend i see this development as a good opportunity for me to contact you to help me put claim to this fund as his next of kin and accommodate this in your account abroad. I know you may doubt the possibility of this but i am telling you that it is as easy as a.b.c bear in mind that i am the person who submitted the information of this late bank customer to the bank board of directors.
I am in position to give you all information about this man as the bank may require from you after applying as the next of kin to claim his balance. I will like you to know that there is no risk involved for now and in future as all dealing with the bank will go through normal banking procedure and all information will equally be documented for future references.
On my own part i want you to keep this as top secret because i am still working in the bank , if they know that i am the person who gave you the information about their deceased customer, I will
loose my job, you are only required to act on my giving you information daily concerning bank decisions towards this transaction.
To remind you, this transaction is not a child's play nor a little amount involved. We are talking of over (TWO Million, Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars), and so I will not like anybody to spoil it for me because it had taken me years to arrive at the stage of looking for a foreigner to assist me.
what i want from you is to co-company so that i can able to grab this fund into you account in your country,after the money hit to your account i will arrange how to come down to your country or any where you want us to share the money.
On hearing from you that you will not cheat or betray me and then i will draft an application letter and send to you in which you will fill and send to the bank for the smooth claim of this fund, together with the full contact of the bank on how you will apply.
Waiting to hear from you, !!!.
Thanks with best regards,
Yours Brother,
Mr Maswell Dagi.
For my last reply I pulled out one of my favorite white trash inbred personalities that only comes out when some SERIOUS shit talkin needs to occur. This is what said personality responded with:
I'm not to comfortable with this Allah talk, GOD damnit.
What the hell kinda abu dabi bullshit are you tryin to run here boy?
I'm an AMERICAN. I don't support no googa booga terrorist crap. In America we love JESUS. And WHITE GOD. And Mary and her little Baby Jesus. And hot dogs, baseball, and bleach blondes with BIIIIIG TITS.
Go to hell you terrorist bastard. GOD don't love you.
I love being me.
READ MORE!!!
He Started our banter with this:
DEAR FRIEND,I AM MR. MASWELL DAGANI , A BANKER IN ONE OF THE REPUTABLE BANK IN BURKINA FASO. I HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU ON A BUSINESS PROPOSAL OF US$2.5M (TEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLAR). THE DEPOSITOR OF THE SAID FUND DIED WITH HIS ENTIRE FAMILY DURING THE IRAQ WAR IN 2006. THE DECEASED CUSTOMER USED HIS WIFE AS THE NEXT OF KIN BUT UNFORTUNATELY, THE WIFE DIED ALONG SIDE WITH HIM DURING THE WAR.PLEASE i WANT YOU TO STAND AS THE NEXT OF KIN AND CLAIM THE FUND WHICH 40% OF THE MONEY WILL BE FOR YOU WHILE 60% WILL BE FOR ME WHICH I WILL COME OVER TO YOUR COUNTRY AS SOON AS THE FUND IS BEEN TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT OK. PLEASE REPLY TO THIS MY PRIVATE E-MAIL: maswell003@hotmail.fr,BEST REGARD,MR. MASWELL DAGANI ,BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER.
I was bored. Definitely. I responded first with this:
Thank you for calling me! How can I help? I like money, and you seem like a nice person so I can't see any reason not to trust you. Let me know what I need to do!
Seymour Hogginfeld
Then today, I just got this back from my new friend:
Dear Sir/Madan,
Assalamu Alaikum ..........................
+226 78 3416 67.
I am very glad for the choice i made by picking you to be my foreign partner in the execution of this transaction and truly "two good heads they say are better than one". Naturally somebody will feel some how been presented with such an offer that comes but once in ones life time, listen i got your contact throught yahoo tounish search with my laptop when i am searching for a trusted partiner who can help me and execute this transaction, really it's the work of Almight Allah who leads me to your private contact,But my dear I assure you of the 100% risk free of this.
Contact me on my private mobile phone. (+226-78 34 16 67)for the confidentiality of this transaction and don't fail to give me a call immediately you got my email for more explanation concern this transaction and also you should not disclosed to the outside world for the security of my job and the success of this deal.
I found it necessary even before your demand to give you indebt explanation on this deal and to give you details and breakdown of the modality which we have to follow to achieve this highly beneficial success. I am a banker and an insider. I know the process to be taken officially in the bank to investigate and verify your claim to grant you approval as the next of kin to the late Mr.ANDREAS SCHRANNER.
My good friend i see this development as a good opportunity for me to contact you to help me put claim to this fund as his next of kin and accommodate this in your account abroad. I know you may doubt the possibility of this but i am telling you that it is as easy as a.b.c bear in mind that i am the person who submitted the information of this late bank customer to the bank board of directors.
I am in position to give you all information about this man as the bank may require from you after applying as the next of kin to claim his balance. I will like you to know that there is no risk involved for now and in future as all dealing with the bank will go through normal banking procedure and all information will equally be documented for future references.
On my own part i want you to keep this as top secret because i am still working in the bank , if they know that i am the person who gave you the information about their deceased customer, I will
loose my job, you are only required to act on my giving you information daily concerning bank decisions towards this transaction.
To remind you, this transaction is not a child's play nor a little amount involved. We are talking of over (TWO Million, Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars), and so I will not like anybody to spoil it for me because it had taken me years to arrive at the stage of looking for a foreigner to assist me.
what i want from you is to co-company so that i can able to grab this fund into you account in your country,after the money hit to your account i will arrange how to come down to your country or any where you want us to share the money.
On hearing from you that you will not cheat or betray me and then i will draft an application letter and send to you in which you will fill and send to the bank for the smooth claim of this fund, together with the full contact of the bank on how you will apply.
Waiting to hear from you, !!!.
Thanks with best regards,
Yours Brother,
Mr Maswell Dagi.
For my last reply I pulled out one of my favorite white trash inbred personalities that only comes out when some SERIOUS shit talkin needs to occur. This is what said personality responded with:
I'm not to comfortable with this Allah talk, GOD damnit.
What the hell kinda abu dabi bullshit are you tryin to run here boy?
I'm an AMERICAN. I don't support no googa booga terrorist crap. In America we love JESUS. And WHITE GOD. And Mary and her little Baby Jesus. And hot dogs, baseball, and bleach blondes with BIIIIIG TITS.
Go to hell you terrorist bastard. GOD don't love you.
I love being me.
Senator Tells Special Needs Child She’s Stupid.
Here is the beginning of my post. And here is the rest of it.
(fark.com, azcentral.com)
What flew up this lady’s nose? Sen. Linda Gray received an email from a 9th grade student asking why they were cutting funding to education. The email was poorly written and contained no punctuation, and asked why the senator had not cut her own budget. Thinking she was clever, Sen. Gray sent a reply basically saying the money the state had spent on the 9th grade girl’s education had been wasted, and that the little girl was a poor learner.
Guess what, SHE WAS. It’s called a learning disability… not at all her fault.
So the senator said that she didn’t know the little girl had special needs. What a presumptuous hag! It’s a NINTH GRADER… You would think an elected official would have a little broader of a spectrum than that, or at least a shred of compassion.
She’s since apologized, and said “I don’t know what got into me that day”… Seriously, what a self esteem crusher! I’m SURE the little girl what more than aware of her own difficulty learning, she didn’t need the wicked witch of Arizona reinforcing it for her.
Since when did they let politicians handle stuff like that themselves? I’ve sent HUNDREDS of well written, thought out letters and emails to the government but all I get back are prefab broad subject letters written by some Douche in the mail room.
Read the story on AZcentral.com
(fark.com, azcentral.com)
What flew up this lady’s nose? Sen. Linda Gray received an email from a 9th grade student asking why they were cutting funding to education. The email was poorly written and contained no punctuation, and asked why the senator had not cut her own budget. Thinking she was clever, Sen. Gray sent a reply basically saying the money the state had spent on the 9th grade girl’s education had been wasted, and that the little girl was a poor learner.
Guess what, SHE WAS. It’s called a learning disability… not at all her fault.
So the senator said that she didn’t know the little girl had special needs. What a presumptuous hag! It’s a NINTH GRADER… You would think an elected official would have a little broader of a spectrum than that, or at least a shred of compassion.
She’s since apologized, and said “I don’t know what got into me that day”… Seriously, what a self esteem crusher! I’m SURE the little girl what more than aware of her own difficulty learning, she didn’t need the wicked witch of Arizona reinforcing it for her.
Since when did they let politicians handle stuff like that themselves? I’ve sent HUNDREDS of well written, thought out letters and emails to the government but all I get back are prefab broad subject letters written by some Douche in the mail room.
Read the story on AZcentral.com
I freakin FOLD.
Last year I wrote a blog about schadenfreud, which is basically the enjoyment gained from watching the misery of others. What is it about negativity that can become so completely addictive? Just like people who often suffer from schadenfreud, overly negative people seem just as addicted to the unproductive behavior.
I recently dated this guy, pretty sweet kid but HORRIBLY addicted to negativity. He had a little dog that he yelled at all the time, a cat that he hated because it turned out to be female, and friends that he would constantly have petty, irrelevant fights with. When we met it burned real hot until we both discovered that we pretty much got on each other’s nerves.
The day I decided to stop taking his calls his friend had called me rattling on about some fight they got into, like I somehow cared. Then the guy I was seeing got pissy with me over the same, petty situation. I think he wanted to go to game stop or something and nobody would give him a ride, super irrelevant… anyway, even though I knew that the guy didn’t really have feelings for me, instead of just letting it go like it should have been, he decides to call me at 9pm to tell me about my lack of testicular fortitude.
Needless to say I didn’t answer.
But the kid was so addicted to negative energy that he had to make himself into a victim. Not to mention that I absolutely LOVE when people drunk dial me and make an absolute fool out of themselves (I love it even more when it’s 9pm and they’re already drunk dialing me. Makes me wonder how the rest of the night went!). Needless to say, I FOLD.
If this was the only person I had dated like that I would just cut my losses and fahghettaboutit, but I have known WAAAAY too many people chronically addicted to negativity. It’s like it infests our minds, rotting away logic and filling its place with pain. I have been in long-term relationships with people who were like that, they just didn’t know how to be happy. It was like the whole relationship existed in negative energy until the final horrid break up.
I wish I could just sit everyone down like Alex from A Clockwork Orange and make them listen to Boards of Canada while watching “The Secret”. Between the awesome, relaxed, laid back groove spun out by Boards and the amazing message in The Secret, I don’t see how any negative-addicted person could still be standing.
I recently dated this guy, pretty sweet kid but HORRIBLY addicted to negativity. He had a little dog that he yelled at all the time, a cat that he hated because it turned out to be female, and friends that he would constantly have petty, irrelevant fights with. When we met it burned real hot until we both discovered that we pretty much got on each other’s nerves.
The day I decided to stop taking his calls his friend had called me rattling on about some fight they got into, like I somehow cared. Then the guy I was seeing got pissy with me over the same, petty situation. I think he wanted to go to game stop or something and nobody would give him a ride, super irrelevant… anyway, even though I knew that the guy didn’t really have feelings for me, instead of just letting it go like it should have been, he decides to call me at 9pm to tell me about my lack of testicular fortitude.
Needless to say I didn’t answer.
But the kid was so addicted to negative energy that he had to make himself into a victim. Not to mention that I absolutely LOVE when people drunk dial me and make an absolute fool out of themselves (I love it even more when it’s 9pm and they’re already drunk dialing me. Makes me wonder how the rest of the night went!). Needless to say, I FOLD.
If this was the only person I had dated like that I would just cut my losses and fahghettaboutit, but I have known WAAAAY too many people chronically addicted to negativity. It’s like it infests our minds, rotting away logic and filling its place with pain. I have been in long-term relationships with people who were like that, they just didn’t know how to be happy. It was like the whole relationship existed in negative energy until the final horrid break up.
I wish I could just sit everyone down like Alex from A Clockwork Orange and make them listen to Boards of Canada while watching “The Secret”. Between the awesome, relaxed, laid back groove spun out by Boards and the amazing message in The Secret, I don’t see how any negative-addicted person could still be standing.
...the harder they fall!
By I M Sampson L(B)SW
I was honored when I was asked to write a political blog for DUNDERBRAIN.com. But, when I heard I should keep my HPO's—that's 'Hot Politico Opinions' fo' ya'll ignorant folkz—to 250 words a blog?... shit… I had to go to a secret place inside my cranium and channel some Andy Rooney. And in very much a 'Rooney-esc' moment, I realized... that people are so ADD these days, no one stops to take the time to really and truly—what? Oh, right 250 words.
I heard a lyric the other day. It was a fascinating lyric. Being somewhat of a superstitious feller I couldn't help but believe that the lyric was being sung directly to me… for a reason. A secret code I could decipher as a compass to maneuver thru this mad, mad, mad, mad world. OR, is that considered a mental disorder?!? Hang on, let me check my DSM IV real quick!
Yet, this upstart Australian lassie makes an honest and raw argument. She sings: "…the world's a better place when it's upside down." Now, to an Australian living near crystal clear waters and miles upon miles of corral reefs, yeah… I'm sure it IS a much better place upside down. But, everyone seems to forget that when you travel to the interior of that island, there are high concentrated populations of lethal animals and socio-pathic offspring of convicts, criminals and prisoners. Basically, Arkansas with a beach.
But this beach bitch understands, that in order for us peasants to have a fair shot at that outplayed, blingy and cliché phrase—the 'American Dream' (even though she's Australian herself)—that the Titans of Wall Street, the jack-Mad-offs and BLAH-gos, the Sen. Craigs and Gov. Jindals, the lethal animals of the Limbaughnious coultermandering species had to fall. And fall they did!.. or, falling they are? (Ugh, grammar rules!)
Either way, these Giants are continuing to fall at an exponential rate. The world they knew yesterday has been turned upside down today. I gather that while most of them were counting and hoarding our $$ for all those many years, that the other shoe was preparing to drop. Unfortunately for them, when it did, they literally dropped right into the po' man's shoes. And bitch, we got our shoes at Wal-Mart for less than $20! So, like any new species thrust into a new ecosystem, the Darwin rules still apply. Oops, I guess evolution DOES exist!
I was honored when I was asked to write a political blog for DUNDERBRAIN.com. But, when I heard I should keep my HPO's—that's 'Hot Politico Opinions' fo' ya'll ignorant folkz—to 250 words a blog?... shit… I had to go to a secret place inside my cranium and channel some Andy Rooney. And in very much a 'Rooney-esc' moment, I realized... that people are so ADD these days, no one stops to take the time to really and truly—what? Oh, right 250 words.
I heard a lyric the other day. It was a fascinating lyric. Being somewhat of a superstitious feller I couldn't help but believe that the lyric was being sung directly to me… for a reason. A secret code I could decipher as a compass to maneuver thru this mad, mad, mad, mad world. OR, is that considered a mental disorder?!? Hang on, let me check my DSM IV real quick!
Yet, this upstart Australian lassie makes an honest and raw argument. She sings: "…the world's a better place when it's upside down." Now, to an Australian living near crystal clear waters and miles upon miles of corral reefs, yeah… I'm sure it IS a much better place upside down. But, everyone seems to forget that when you travel to the interior of that island, there are high concentrated populations of lethal animals and socio-pathic offspring of convicts, criminals and prisoners. Basically, Arkansas with a beach.
But this beach bitch understands, that in order for us peasants to have a fair shot at that outplayed, blingy and cliché phrase—the 'American Dream' (even though she's Australian herself)—that the Titans of Wall Street, the jack-Mad-offs and BLAH-gos, the Sen. Craigs and Gov. Jindals, the lethal animals of the Limbaughnious coultermandering species had to fall. And fall they did!.. or, falling they are? (Ugh, grammar rules!)
Either way, these Giants are continuing to fall at an exponential rate. The world they knew yesterday has been turned upside down today. I gather that while most of them were counting and hoarding our $$ for all those many years, that the other shoe was preparing to drop. Unfortunately for them, when it did, they literally dropped right into the po' man's shoes. And bitch, we got our shoes at Wal-Mart for less than $20! So, like any new species thrust into a new ecosystem, the Darwin rules still apply. Oops, I guess evolution DOES exist!
Oh no, sweetie darling.
I just got the buzz from EsterGoldberg.com that my favorite British comedy Absolutely Fabulous is going to be brought over the pond and made into an American series. At first I was shocked and almost infuriated so I had to do a little more research on the subject. Then, after seeing that 3rd Rock from the Sun’s Kristen Johnston will be playing Patsy I became a little more optimistic.
I’ve always been a huge fan of Ab Fab, in fact anything Jennifer Saunders touches turns to gold. The fact that she’s coming over as well to be executive producer, and approves the project at all says something. The woman knows funny, and she knows what isn’t funny. So far the actresses they’ve cast to play the leading ladies (Kathryn Hahn as Edina, Kristen Johnston as Patsy) seem very fitting.
Johnston says that the characters are trying to be more PC, chew nicorette gum instead of smoking, and are always hung over. The thought of Patsy not waking up with a cigarette ready in her mouth, lighter in hand is a bit challenging to me but still I think it could be a fun transition. The UK series is played out, it had an amazing run but it’s been over for a while. In fact, there have already been several non-UK adaptations of the show have already been made and bombed. France has made one, Canada made a show called P.R. based off Ab Fab, even Roseanne Barr tried to get an American Ab Fab with Carrie Fisher that never saw fruition.
Remakes happen, especially BBC to America. The Office has done amazingly, even with American TV it happens, WB just reprised 90210 which by all means should have bombed but I still see the ads for it every week. The fact is, if FOX tells people they’re going to like it, they’re going to like it. Even if they don’t they’ll still play the hell out of a show for a few seasons, sell a couple DVD’s, then sell the cow again.
That’s just Hollywood and junk. I wish they’d hurry up and make a modern day Bonanza remake.
I’ve always been a huge fan of Ab Fab, in fact anything Jennifer Saunders touches turns to gold. The fact that she’s coming over as well to be executive producer, and approves the project at all says something. The woman knows funny, and she knows what isn’t funny. So far the actresses they’ve cast to play the leading ladies (Kathryn Hahn as Edina, Kristen Johnston as Patsy) seem very fitting.
Johnston says that the characters are trying to be more PC, chew nicorette gum instead of smoking, and are always hung over. The thought of Patsy not waking up with a cigarette ready in her mouth, lighter in hand is a bit challenging to me but still I think it could be a fun transition. The UK series is played out, it had an amazing run but it’s been over for a while. In fact, there have already been several non-UK adaptations of the show have already been made and bombed. France has made one, Canada made a show called P.R. based off Ab Fab, even Roseanne Barr tried to get an American Ab Fab with Carrie Fisher that never saw fruition.
Remakes happen, especially BBC to America. The Office has done amazingly, even with American TV it happens, WB just reprised 90210 which by all means should have bombed but I still see the ads for it every week. The fact is, if FOX tells people they’re going to like it, they’re going to like it. Even if they don’t they’ll still play the hell out of a show for a few seasons, sell a couple DVD’s, then sell the cow again.
That’s just Hollywood and junk. I wish they’d hurry up and make a modern day Bonanza remake.
Goddamned Salt Shakers.
I think, with many budding relationships, the biggest threat – even more than cuter boys – is their damned friends. For some reason, especially in the gay community friends can be the biggest salt shakers known to man...
Its always the same story, they get their friend’s new boo off in a corner by themselves and start spilling just enough information to make the new boo insecure about their current situation. They act like they don’t know that there’s something going on between you and their friend, like you’re just some “new friend” that’s come around and they drop some tid bit about a guy their friend was recently dating, or some obscure event which puts them perfectly in the wrong light.
And it’s always the same pathetic, poor lonely saps who are far too dependant on their friend in question that do it. They can’t stand the thought of any threat to their friendship which relationships, if good, inevitably always are. No matter what the stupid bullshit Freudian explanation may be, I think it’s sad and sick to prevent your friend from pursuing love because you’re insecure about being alone yourself.
I am blessed with exceptional friends, in my opinion at least. In a sense I think many of my friends are protective of me because they’ve seen my personal heartbreak and 808 first hand, but for the most part are very supportive of what I do. A friend of mine told me the other day in conversation about the bro-code, and a bunch of these little gay boys and fag hags in the world need to familiarize themselves with it. Your bro is not your bitch, don’t treat them that way. If anything over-beef your friend, make them seem like an even better person than they are, or even better - STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT.
Like my imaginary overweight country momma used to say, “if you can’t say nothin nice, go sit next to that ugly girl sitting by herself. She’s the only one that really gives a shit.”
Its always the same story, they get their friend’s new boo off in a corner by themselves and start spilling just enough information to make the new boo insecure about their current situation. They act like they don’t know that there’s something going on between you and their friend, like you’re just some “new friend” that’s come around and they drop some tid bit about a guy their friend was recently dating, or some obscure event which puts them perfectly in the wrong light.
And it’s always the same pathetic, poor lonely saps who are far too dependant on their friend in question that do it. They can’t stand the thought of any threat to their friendship which relationships, if good, inevitably always are. No matter what the stupid bullshit Freudian explanation may be, I think it’s sad and sick to prevent your friend from pursuing love because you’re insecure about being alone yourself.
I am blessed with exceptional friends, in my opinion at least. In a sense I think many of my friends are protective of me because they’ve seen my personal heartbreak and 808 first hand, but for the most part are very supportive of what I do. A friend of mine told me the other day in conversation about the bro-code, and a bunch of these little gay boys and fag hags in the world need to familiarize themselves with it. Your bro is not your bitch, don’t treat them that way. If anything over-beef your friend, make them seem like an even better person than they are, or even better - STAY THE HELL OUT OF IT.
Like my imaginary overweight country momma used to say, “if you can’t say nothin nice, go sit next to that ugly girl sitting by herself. She’s the only one that really gives a shit.”
Then it hit me - I freakin HATE cards!
Lately, as mentioned before, I’ve been using poker as a metaphor for love. Texas hold ‘em in particular, and to me at least it really makes sense. It’s helped me to put dating into a perspective that I can understand, but then this morning as I’m laying in bed meditating on my life, I realized I freakin HATE card games!
I always have. My closest group of friends all play this little game called “shit head”. It’s a fun enough game but it’s just WAAAAY too analog for me. I always feel like asking “can we play this on the Wii instead?” The only game I enjoy playing at all is poker, and that’s more for the atmosphere and socialization.
My real problem is I keep finding excuses for myself NOT to date, which works out all nice and shiny except I really don’t want to be old and bitter – and single. If I’m gonna be old and bitter, I want someone there to appreciate it – even if it is a paid professional. Someone once told me that’s how he defined old, when you started having to pay for sex.
Anyway, the only game I’ve ever liked was solitaire, because there’s nobody around to tell you when you’re breaking the rules. And really, all the other games get the deck all shuffled up. Solitaire is the only game where at the end of each round won the deck is replaced to perfect order.
I always have. My closest group of friends all play this little game called “shit head”. It’s a fun enough game but it’s just WAAAAY too analog for me. I always feel like asking “can we play this on the Wii instead?” The only game I enjoy playing at all is poker, and that’s more for the atmosphere and socialization.
My real problem is I keep finding excuses for myself NOT to date, which works out all nice and shiny except I really don’t want to be old and bitter – and single. If I’m gonna be old and bitter, I want someone there to appreciate it – even if it is a paid professional. Someone once told me that’s how he defined old, when you started having to pay for sex.
Anyway, the only game I’ve ever liked was solitaire, because there’s nobody around to tell you when you’re breaking the rules. And really, all the other games get the deck all shuffled up. Solitaire is the only game where at the end of each round won the deck is replaced to perfect order.
NEW STAR TREK TRAILER!
NERD OUT WITH ME FOR A MINUTE!
Go check out the new Star Trek trailer, like, NOW.
Go 'head child, go look. I'll be waiting here when you're done to discuss.
OK, now that you've seen it, WASN'T THAT SO FREAKIN COOL! Finally, a trailer that gives a little clue to the plot of JJ Abrams' take on the quintessential science fiction story of all time.
So many rumors have now been either confirmed or combined. The trailer starts out with someone trying to recruit Captain Kirk into Star Fleet, daring him to do better than his father had done before him. Apparently he does.
The funniest part of the trailer - Why is it that Captain Kirk is always getting the captain's chair on accident or faudulent means? Lets examine, starting with the movies.
The Motion Picture. Admiral Kirk is giving a good inspection to the refitted Enterprise. On the tour he decides "you know, I think I want to be the captain instead" and screws everything up.
The Wrath of Khan. The Crew starts out, Spock in charge. Kirk decides that he'd rather run things so Spock rolls for him and gives up the captain's chair. The rest of the movie is filled with failed guilt trip attempts from Spock, then in a final attempt to guilt Kirk, spock dies.
The Search For Spock. Kirk feels bad so this time he STEALS the excelsior and goes to hunt down his best buddy. In the process Christopher Lloyd shows up and blows up all the ships, but then Kirk steals HIS ship and takes off with it.
The Journey Home. The whole movie takes place in a stolen ship. Nuff said. Then the crew all back together with a slightly disoriented and disturbed spock go back in time to steal whales.
The Final Frontier. The first Star Trek movie where Kirk is the actual captain of the Enterprise from start to finish, but this time Spock's brother steals the enterprise from HIM! That's right, someone pulls a Kirk on Kirk. Then when Kirk gets control of his ship again, he tells god to go suck a dick and starts all kinds of trouble.
The Undiscovered Country. Again Kirk is the Captain, this time for the last time - but he gets thrown in Klingon prison. Spock picks him up and they go blow the top off a Star Fleet conspiracy.
AND FINALLY -Generations. At the very beginning of the movie the Enterprise captain SUCKS so Kirk gets all antsy until they let him drive. After that he gets killed by a space wave and then, his captaining days are over.
NOW - YEARS LATER - And before any of this other stuff happened, it looks like Kirk with get the ship passed on to him like a cheap hooker yet again. Needless to say I'm about to wet myself I'm so excited about this movie. I literally haven't been this Jazzed up since Matrix Revolutions.
I need a PIG!!!!1
After seeing this video of Kingsford the piglet I've definitively decided that I need a DUNDERPIG. That would be it's name, too. DUNDERPIG. I think my dog Skrappi would love a little pig to fallow him around like Kingsford does. Maybe that's what I'll get Skrappi for his 10th birthday, a little pig. He would LOVE it.
When I was little my cousins had a pig and I always thought it was creepy but now, with my life where it is, it would be totally appropriate. A little pot belly pig like this guy would totally fit into my world.
Kingsford Goes to the Beach - video powered by Metacafe
When I was little my cousins had a pig and I always thought it was creepy but now, with my life where it is, it would be totally appropriate. A little pot belly pig like this guy would totally fit into my world.
Kingsford Goes to the Beach - video powered by Metacafe
Hangover Hell.
Hangover Hell.
I don't know why I wake up every day between 7 and 8 am. No matter how much I drink, no matter how late I'm up, I'm always up early.
This morning I was still drunk when I awoke and decided to post all of my pics from last night on myspace, after thinking I had cleaned them up a bit. The progression of the night was apparent in the pictures, the first being a tame, cute pic of The Matty and I... the last being myself choked by an Amanda and another appearance by the barefooted nasty dancing couple...
After getting a bite to eat and reviewing some of my picture comment approvals that I had pending I looked over the album again and said to myself "Jejus, Justin..." and delete, delete, delete. I'm sure everyone involved will be glad to know I did NO tagging in this album.
I kissed a girl on a dare and said "Ew there's no facial hair!" and laughed like a little asian school girl. That was the first girl I have kissed in 11 years and I don't feel like I'm missing anything.
On another note, DUNDERBRAIN! will be welcoming a couple contributing authors soon, so keep an I out for their material popping up soon! Check out the film strip from last night. This is AFTER taking out a good 20 pictures or so of drunken tomfoolery.
I don't know why I wake up every day between 7 and 8 am. No matter how much I drink, no matter how late I'm up, I'm always up early.
This morning I was still drunk when I awoke and decided to post all of my pics from last night on myspace, after thinking I had cleaned them up a bit. The progression of the night was apparent in the pictures, the first being a tame, cute pic of The Matty and I... the last being myself choked by an Amanda and another appearance by the barefooted nasty dancing couple...
After getting a bite to eat and reviewing some of my picture comment approvals that I had pending I looked over the album again and said to myself "Jejus, Justin..." and delete, delete, delete. I'm sure everyone involved will be glad to know I did NO tagging in this album.
I kissed a girl on a dare and said "Ew there's no facial hair!" and laughed like a little asian school girl. That was the first girl I have kissed in 11 years and I don't feel like I'm missing anything.
On another note, DUNDERBRAIN! will be welcoming a couple contributing authors soon, so keep an I out for their material popping up soon! Check out the film strip from last night. This is AFTER taking out a good 20 pictures or so of drunken tomfoolery.
DUNDERBRAIN! PSP Wallpaper.
Make your PSP a DUNDERHEAD with this nifty jpeg for your next wallpaper!
Why are gay men obsessed with boobs?
Ladies, if you have EVER been out to a gay bar and you’ve got a decent rack you know what I’m talking about. Gay men are obsessed with boobs for some reason! I think I just figured out why I always see little boisterous busty girls running around gay bars, they get tons of attention!
I SWEAR every gay man does it. It’s a cleavage issue I think, and the bigger they are the harder it is to look away. I’m sure Freud would have a hay day with the subject. I’m a gay man and I’m secure with this fact, but I totally just caught myself ogling at a picture of a woman with big breasts. I really don’t think it’s an issue of arousal, because it doesn’t turn me on. Cleavage is like one of these.
I can imagine how a woman would get a lot more attention at a gay bar by showing off her rack than a straight bar. I can’t tell you how many myspace pictures I’ve seen of my gay friends where they’re at the bar with some girl, grabbing her breast. I’m sure there’s one or two out there of me but I would never admit to it.
I SWEAR every gay man does it. It’s a cleavage issue I think, and the bigger they are the harder it is to look away. I’m sure Freud would have a hay day with the subject. I’m a gay man and I’m secure with this fact, but I totally just caught myself ogling at a picture of a woman with big breasts. I really don’t think it’s an issue of arousal, because it doesn’t turn me on. Cleavage is like one of these.
I can imagine how a woman would get a lot more attention at a gay bar by showing off her rack than a straight bar. I can’t tell you how many myspace pictures I’ve seen of my gay friends where they’re at the bar with some girl, grabbing her breast. I’m sure there’s one or two out there of me but I would never admit to it.WHITE TRASH WEEK MARCH 22-28!!!
GET READY DUNDERHEADS! The last REAL week in March marks the first annual White Trash Week on DUNDERBRAIN! Here at DUNDERBRAIN we celebrate our white trash roots and everything that comes along with them. From things like Noodling that we looked at in yesterday’s entry to toilet bowl planters to the ever infamous mullet, we loves the essence of our lowest common denominator.
What is White Trash Week? It’s a week long online white trash party. March 22-28 everything featured on the website will be white trash oriented and be sure to eject a laugh or two. I really want to get as much original content as possible, be it pictures (original or your favorites from the web) videos, links, anything that our DUNDERHEADS out there love about white trash.
Just to show how hilariously tasteless this event will be, I sent out an invite on facebook last night around midnightish and by 8am 11 people have already flat out refused the invitation. Like they were saying “You know, we’re too good for this event, and we don’t even know how cool it’s going to be.”
Come check out the facebook invite here.
Email me any content you want featured on the site to JustinThymeRMT@yahoo.com. I want to get as much in as possible before March 22 when we officially kick off the event. Keep checking DUNDERBRAIN.com for updates.
BWAH! FISTING BADGERS!
OMG, Thank you to my dear friend Martin for passing this along to me. Its from NewsBiscuit, the much funnier "Onion" style satirical website.
Fisting Badgers.
Jesus.
This is horrible. I love it. But even though shoving your fist up a badger's anus for sport may not be real, any good redneck knows that shoving your fist down a catfish's throat is. Noodling, as it's known 'round these parts, is essentially catching catfish with your bare hands. I should have saved this for White Trash Week but I couldn't resist. DUNDERBRAIN needs a healthy dose of white trash. Check out this video from FearlessTV on YouTube.
Fisting Badgers.
Jesus.
This is horrible. I love it. But even though shoving your fist up a badger's anus for sport may not be real, any good redneck knows that shoving your fist down a catfish's throat is. Noodling, as it's known 'round these parts, is essentially catching catfish with your bare hands. I should have saved this for White Trash Week but I couldn't resist. DUNDERBRAIN needs a healthy dose of white trash. Check out this video from FearlessTV on YouTube.
2009 APRIL DUNDERFOOL - NOMINATE!
Who deserves the title of April DUNDERFOOL 2009? Should it be Sarah Palin for the Turkey Incident? Should it be Anna Wintour for that ridiculous Dune-style dress that everyone overlooked? Should it be Rush Limbaugh just for being Rush? WHO BY GOD, WHO? Nominate your candidate in the comments bellow to vote for the DUNDERFOOL 2009!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)